Random Thoughts

It's a bit sad that Vir had no voice in who his parents should be. He just showed up in my uterus one day and that pretty much determined his whole life - just like that. I'd like to think he'd have chosen Vijay and me out of a line-up if he did have a choice, but sometimes, I'm not completely sure. Like on days when I haven't spent much time with him and just given him cursory hugs in between trips from my computer to the bathroom and back. Or when I find myself getting impatient with him for clinging to me and not wanting me to walk away. Or when I try to force him to eat khichdi but strangely, don't let him chew on Baggdu's tail, which (don't I get it?) is so much better. And I know he can't understand me, but if he could, what would he say to my constant whining about not having watched a movie in almost a year, or not having slept on a full bed for a full night? It's not like he asked to be hungry in the middle of the night, or to have teeth cut out of his gums and make his life difficult.

On the other hand, perhaps he would pass off my strange behavior as "the way grown ups are" and pick me anyway. Because he'd see that noone can love him as I do. And while that doesn't make khichdi any yummier, it's got to count for something.