Tuesday, March 8, 2011

Parenting is tough

I had a particularly difficult day with Vir and vented about parenting on Facebook today. I was advised to write about it here instead. That got me thinking so here I am.

What's tough about parenting? Let's see if I can even begin to put this in words. Never having a totally peaceful night's sleep either because the kids wake you up or because you expect to be woken up even if you aren't or simply because some percent of your brain is thinking about the kids even when you're asleep. Never being able to switch off completely and do or think nothing because your brain is permanently wired to the kids and some part of it just won't let go even for a minute. Not knowing if the decisions you make all the time are right or wrong for them and knowing that right or wrong - it's all you. They depend on you and if you're screwing up, you're screwing with them. And then knowing that you're screwing up a lot. Not knowing how to handle the daily ups and downs and the big and small disasters and messes that naughty hands and curious minds just know how to create. Being too tired to clean more poop. Fishing out miscellaneous items from the poop pot. Feeding fussy eaters. Knowing that they are so vulnerable and trying to keep them safe and healthy. Worrying worrying worrying about their health and nutrition. Dealing with loud noises and tantrums while trying to maintain some amount of sanity and even panache as the parent and responsible adult in the room. Setting a good example - that's a particularly tough one! Looking at them while they sleep and feeling guilty about everything you're doing and everything you're not doing for them.

See what I mean? I can't even begin to put it in words...I've written so many things already and could go on. But what's stopping me (after all the ranting) is the thing that I find toughest of all and that's the guilt of complaining about them. Because literally above every other thing is the fact that they're my greatest love and for them, it's all okay. Many times over. Besides, they're just so unbelievably cute. What sort of person would I be to complain about those little hampers of adorableness who can make you smile on the most grey of days and make everything feel better with one snotty, slobbery, just-for-you kiss?

So let's just pretend I said nothing about any of this, okay? 

3 comments:

Shilpa Bhatnagar said...

Okay!

(Hope that made you feel a bit better).
:)

Anonymous said...

HAHA! I think my mom still complains about me! You really do give yourself the third degree! Complain away...it's natural. And it's not going to stop. Complaining, nagging yet loving and doting. That's what moms are all about!

Gaay said...

Ha ha, love it!