Why do I keep doing this?

I have been so lazy about posting for a while that there's now a huge backlog of updates from Vir's side of the world. I'm going to try and present an executive summary here, but I'm pretty sure I'll miss out stuff. So, Vir, some out of the last month-full of your antics are now never to be documented since I don't remember the details. Hopefully though, there are more antics where those came from, and I'll have more chances to write them. I can almost hear the forces that be laughing to themselves ("Crazy lady wants more antics, we'll give her more antics!") Here's a random list of things since the last time I posted...

• His vocabulary is now too long to keep count of. He basically tries to copy everything I say, especially if I say it slowly and deliberately. What amazes me is the number of words and labels for things he's picked up without any of us even realizing it. Like when he pointed to a cartoon in the newspaper and announced that it was a "cartooo," or when he looked at the mop lying in the balcony and informed me that it was a "pochu" (pocha is Hindi for mop.) Some of his words are so cute, I keep getting him to repeat them a million times a day...like when someone goes to the bathroom, I make it a point to ask him where the person is just so I can hear him say "baa-(long pause)-thoooom." That's also his response when I ask him where he should be going to potty, but of course, that's all just theoretical knowledge. He'll do well in a viva question about potty habits, but will flunk any practical exam on this all important of subjects.
• What's also amazing to me is how much Vir is constantly observing and absorbing whether or not we're realizing it. I didn't think, for example, that he can identify the sound of birds chirping. If you live in Gurgaon, you'll know why I might think this. But I guess there's hope for Gurgaon and there must be birds here, because he heard the sound on TV and accurately told us it was "chi-yaa" (chidiya being Hindi for birds). I'm beginning to think he now knows everything...he knows where things are kept in the house, he knows when we're going to be going out somewhere, he knows when others are going to be going out and are looking for ways to sneak past him, he knows when I'm thinking of going to the bathroom and trying to find a way to do it without him clinging to me and begging me not to go, he knows what time he goes to the park every day and that there's a routine for getting him ready to go and play - from drinking milk, to changing his clothes to applying mosquito repellant, to wearing shoes, to gathering his water and napkin and toy of the day, he knows when he can get away with something and when he's crossed the line, he knows how to make me come around when he's crossed the line, and most of all, he knows how to get his way. He's even beginning to figure out generalizations all by himself...he now calls all older males "bhaiya" and all older girls/women "didi" (older brother and sister respectively). It's pretty comical when sees Shah Rukh Khan on TV or a picture of Lakshmi Niwas Mittal on a book I'm reading and proclaims them his bhaiyas! Or when he stands in the balcony and yells didi or bhaiya to random passersby in the super loud scream that is now his voice for 70% of the day.
• The other big thing is the variety of extreme antics that he has picked up. Honestly, that boy does nothing straight all day. If I can't hear or see him for more than a minute, I can bet he's sitting behind the blinds in my room putting his fingers in the grooves of the window and licking the dust that comes off. If I can't find something, or if I see him looking deceptively innocently at something from the balcony, I know something's been thrown off the second floor. If he's not doing this, he's climbing chairs, tables, side tables, beds, bookshelves, balcony ledges, or our backs. If he's not doing that, chances are he's torturing Baggdu, which is his favorite pastime. God bless Baggdu for being as tolerant as he is. I guess one incentive for the dog is all the food that comes to him when Vir comes running asking urgently for a bicsuit or another snack and then goes busily looking for Baggdu to feed it to him. You scratch my back, and I'll pretend not to care when you pull my tail (or my balls, as has sometimes happened, much to the dismay of all spectators).

One thing is certain...he literally makes my day. He takes up every minute of it in a way that I can't really say I've been productive in the normal sense of the term. All I have at the end of the day to call it productive is a baby sleeping in my bed - clean from his bath to wash off the grubbiness of the day, tired from constant naughtiness, satisfied from his indispensable bottle of milk, and miraculously still in one piece despite the odds presented by his behavior and personality!